Comedy At Its Worst
by Vonowe
Summary: Dooku retires. Sideous dies. Anakin is good. Random adventures. Insanity reigns supreme. Check it out and don't forget to R&R!
1. Chapter 1

** Everyone here KNOWS I am bad at comedy; which that is exactly why I am doing this. I think being able to write a successful humor story is very important. Without humor, what would happen to the world? Anyway, I hope this is amusing so you won't think I suck at parodies…**

**Disclaimer: I totally DO****not****OWN IT!**

**Notes: Obi-wan is on sugar high from Jellybeans. Ahsoka hasn't slept in days so she is a little tipsy too. Everyone is insane. Dooku relies on everything Asajj says. She does whatever she wants. Anakin is the only sane person. He HATES insanity.**

**On for the story! AND THIS TAKES PLACE JUST AFTER ANAKIN WAS STUCK WITH AHSOKA!**

Count Dooku looked toward Asajj Ventress and laughed. "What is it my master?" She sighed irritated. "I have an EVIL plan to make Sideous proud." Dooku replied grinning evilly. "And what would that be?" Asajj asked somehow dreading his answer. "I am going to make Anakin a better Jedi! And then I will kill every general on OUR side. How does that sound? I'll even let you kill them." He begged. Asajj thought for a moment then nodded.

"Let's do this. First we must get CLOSE to Coruscant and then-" ….

…THREE DAYS LATER…

Anakin was calmly walking down the hall in the Jedi temple when suddenly there was a blast of light. Anakin fell to the ground unconscious…

Obi-wan happened to be standing next to him and he yelped. "AHHHHH! Anakin, breath. LIVE O ANI!" Obi-wan _danced_ above Anakin, hyperventilating. Ahsoka was walking by and when she saw Anakin passed out on the floor and Obi-wan hyperventilating next to Anakin, she guessed something was wrong. She ran over.

"Master Kenobi, did you have jellybeans again and scare Anakin again?" Ahsoka asked. "NO! He died because of a light. And I had jellybeans too!" Obi-wan screamed and then resumed his spasms. Ahsoka groaned and slapped him. "Stop freaking out! We need to dump some cold water on him." Obi-wan stared at her for a second, for once looking half-way sane. Then he shook it off and nodded stupidly, "I'll go fetch it!"

Ahsoka watched him go then turned back to her master. Anakin opened his eyes and coughed. And then Obi-wan returned and dumped the cold water on Anakin's face. Anakin sputtered and coughed. Ahsoka gasped. "WE WERE TOO LATE! HE IS GUNNA DIE!" Obi-wan and Ahsoka yelled together.

Anakin opened his eyes and they were, green. Really, really green. "Master, are your eyes _glowing_?!" She asked. Anakin opened his mouth and squeaked. "And you can't talk!" Ahsoka grabbed Anakin and ran through the halls toward the Medbay. Anakin was bumping along behind her. Obi-wan skipped alongside poor Anakin and eating jellybeans.

Anakin kept attempting to say something but he could only yelp in pain…

Sideous suddenly realized the Dark Side of the force was suddenly whisked away. The only bad was from him. That wasn't good. He decided to ask Dooku about it. He turned the comm on in the middle of the Senate. "Dooky poo, why is the Dark Side gone?" he asked ignoring people stampeding out of the Senate in fear.

"My master, I have taken care of all the generals on OUR side. Also I made Anakin so that he would become a good guy again." Dooku chirped and held up a Separatists face to prove it. Sideous was so angry that his head blew off and nobody had to worry about him again….

Dooku was now the main bad dude in the galaxy. He was pretty happy. Now he could go back to his homeworld and never fight again. He noticed that the people were looking at him from Sideous's side. "I now say that the war is over. I am going to retire and relax. Goodbye." Dooku laughed like a madman. Dooku then turned the comm off and went home forever.…

Anakin finally was pronounced fit and he left. He was perfectly fine. "Hey Ahsoka, our new job is put the galaxy together again and clean Sideous's guts off the Senate floors." Ahsoka, Anakin, and Obi-wan set out to put order back into the galaxy….

**And there is my first chapter! Short and weird I know, but do you like it? Please R&R.**

**Ahsoka: Strawberries milked that cow over there…**

**Anakin: WHAT?! Ahsoka, I am going to take you to see a mental person who maybe could help you.**

**Ahsoka: WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYY?**

**Author: Goodbye!**

**THE END FOR NOW! INSANITY WILL SOON RESUME NEXT CHAPTER!**


	2. Chapter 2

** Hello again! Vonowë is back with chapter two! I hope you all like it and review! RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW**

**Sorry for the wait. My Wi-Fi was down. **

**Disclaimer: Don't own this and never will.**

**Reviews: Randomfan. Thank you for reviewing my story! I hope you like this chapter as well as the first. **

**Prankprinces123, I'm glad you are following this!**

**Guest, that was one weird review! Thanks I think...**

**On for the story!**

Anakin, Ahsoka, and Obi-wan had finally finished cleaning Sideous's guts off the Senate. Anakin was very, very shocked and sad. He HAD thought Sideous was a friend after all. Ahsoka looked at him with a smirk playing at her lips, "Do you wanna build a snowman?" she sang very off-tune. Obi-wan caught on quickly, "Or ride up and down the halls."

Anakin groaned and shook his head, "No, I am going to go out by myself for the night. You two aren't comin' with me." He really needed to get away from them. Obi-wan started bawling like a deranged cow while Ahsoka turned to the Dark Side. Anakin sighed, "Just for tonight. Tomorrow we can be as crazy as we wish but for now, I wanna be alone." Ahsoka turned back to the Light Side and nodded, "Sure thing master Jedi."

Anakin breathed a sigh of relief, anything that would get him away from his 'friends' he would go for. "Bye," he chirped and fled as fast as he could out the door. Ahsoka and Obi-wan looked at each other and laughed like mad-men (or in Ahsoka's case, woman). "You wanna annoy Padme now?" Obi-wan asked, a devious smirk beginning to creep on his face. Ahsoka found that disturbing. "Obi-wan, why is a devious smirk creeping up your face?"

Obi-wan shrugged, "I dunno."

Ahsoka shrugged and led the way toward Padme's apartment….

Anakin gasped for breath as he hid behind a Speeder. _Thank the force I lost them_. He thought. Anakin jumped inside the Speeder and powered it up. He was out of the Hanger before you could say, "Hot dog!"

Anakin drove wildly (keyword wildly) along the road and pulled up next to an abandoned building. "Maybe I can have peace and quiet here." He whispered and entered. There was a gang of thugs sitting there. "Aww, man." He complained and did an about-face before he was grabbed. He leapt into his Speeder and realized the only peaceful place was off-world. _Well, better not tell Ahsoka or Obi-wan. They would probably kill me or themselves if they realized_. He thought. Anakin steered the Speeder toward Padme's….

Ahsoka was scaring poor Padme out of her mind. Obi-wan was eating all the jelly-beans. C-3P0 was trying (unsuccessfully) to clean up the massive mess. Padme was hiding in a corner. Random security guards were hyperventilating all around the room. This is what Anakin walked in to see. He totally blew a gasket.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE FORCE IS GOING ON HERE? NEVERMIND, I DON'T WANNA KNOW. JUST GET OUT OF HERE!" Obi-wan and Ahsoka saw his angry face and decided to run like the dickens out of there. Soon only Padme and Anakin were standing in the room. Anakin's face looked like a cherry. Or maybe a tomato.

"Ani, its okay. They were just wanting to have fun?" she asked, wondering herself whether they were or not. Anakin seemed distracted and hardly took any notice of her. "Padme," Anakin suddenly said, "pack your bags. We are going. The Jedi can carry on without me. We can go back to Naboo. And stay there." He turned toward her, his eyes pleading for her to accept.

"Sure, but um… I have something to tell you." Padme began and tried not to look directly at Anakin's face. "What?" he asked and moved closer to her. "Ani, I am pregnant." Anakin stared and then started whooping and hollering like it was a big celebration.

"THAT IS THE BEST NEWS I HAVE HAD ALL DAY! I LOVE YOU PADME! MY WIFE IS PREGNANT!" His voice echoed throughout all of Coruscant. Yoda had a heart-attack back at the Jedi temple. Mace Windu choked on air. Plo Koon just laughed like some sort of demented ghost. Kit swooned. Obi-wan had a party with Ahsoka….

**AND WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT? I know… but none of you do with maybe the exception of prankprincess123. Sorry for the wait and the shortness of the chapter. Like I said before, Wi-Fi was down.**

**Anakin: Ahsoka, please stop hugging it.**

**Ahsoka: Aww, why?**

**Anakin: Hugging the tree is weird. That's why.**

**Ahsoka: I guess I'm a tree-hugger then.**

**Author: Goodbye! Hope ya'll will review. Seriously. More than a THOUSAND people have read this and only ONE person reviewed.**

**Goodbye, And May The Force Be With You!**


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